I’ve been thinking and overthinking a lot lately. About how much we have grown since we’ve met. We have always been pretty accepting about who we wished to be. Believe me, that will never change. Even if you decide to dye your hair a violent shade of pink tomorrow, I’ll still love you just as much as I love you right now.
But let’s not just dwell on appearances. I am your best friend as you are mine, so remember that our friendship is a safe place where you are allowed to be whoever you want to be. I’ve always told you that you should feel whatever you want to feel, without caring about what the world might think of you. (Believe me, as someone who has cared too much about what the world thinks, it’s not worth your time. And it’s not worth ruining your mental health over.)
I am here for you — every second of every day that you might need me. I’ll tell you funny stories whenever you might need a laugh. I’ll sit with you in silence if you just want to cry and not talk about what has gone wrong in your life. And I promise not to give up on you, even when you’ve given up on yourself.
Now that we’ve gotten our promises out of the way, let me tell you something: The bravest thing you’ll ever do is let someone love you again.
We all have stories, we all have scars. And we all believe that the heartbreaks we’ve suffered cannot be recovered from. That the world has hurt us in unimaginable ways. Let me tell you right now, that’s the biggest lie you can tell yourself.
You are not your past. You are not your mistakes. And you most definitely are not undeserving of love!
Our lives are hard. And we struggle every single day. If there’s someone that wants to share in your struggle, that wants to know what makes you happy and what makes you annoyed, and that just wants to be there (besides me of course), please let that person in.
Just because it did not work the last time doesn’t mean it won’t work out this time. Just because someone didn’t know how to love you, and broke your heart before, doesn’t mean that it will happen again.
I know you’re tired of risking it all, over and over again. But without risks, there is nothing left in our mundane lives. I know, because I’ve always toed the line and look where it got me. I’m just as hurt and broken and scared to love as you are!
In this life, no one can guarantee you that they won’t break your heart. I am sure I’ve broken yours quite a few times. But you still love me, and you’re still there for me. We have undying faith in our friendship… Why can’t we have that same faith when we learn to love again?
I cannot promise you that you won’t get hurt. That you won’t end up crying at 2 am in the morning. That every single day will be full of sunshine and daisies.
There will be dark clouds and grey skies, and there will rainfall. But I can promise you that I’ll be standing right next to you, stopping you from falling down. That when you want to cry your heart out 2 am, I’ll be on the other end of the line, listening to you as you blame me for telling you let your guard down. I’ll gift you roses on the days the sun shines a little less bright, and we can dance together in the rain (even though I’m terrible at it) until the storms pass, and the sun shines again.
This life is beautiful. Our friendship makes everything in the world ten times better. We will always be there for each other, even when we forget to be there for ourselves.
So why are you so scared? I’m right next to you.
Jump! Jump! I’ll jump with you, holding tightly onto your hand – and I’ll never let go of you.
This article was previously published at Thought Catalog.
Aniesha Brahma is the author of The Secret Proposal, The Guitar Girl, When Our Worlds Collide, All Signs Lead Back to You and P.C. Chandra’s The Awesome Four: Coming Together & The Legend of Stardust. She founded BUZZ Magazine in 2014 with two of her friends. Besides being the editor of BUZZ, she runs two blogs: Aniesha’s Musings and Bibliotheque. She also describes herself as a crazy cat lady and a Potterhead. Aniesha also recently started co-curating book events under the banner of #BooksOverChai with Pradipta Mandal.